Human
I feel human for the first time in about a week today! Whew!
The retreat for men and women in Iowa was so rich and textured it is difficult to convey. My staff of four women and three men wondered why we hadn't tried this mix before. There were people who arrived very nervous about having those of the opposite gender also attending, but by the retreat's conclusion, it became a tremendous example of health. One woman approached me and my male co-leader and looked this man square in the eye and said how wonderful it was to hear his voice as an abuse survivor and as a healthy man. She stopped seeing gender and began seeing hope.
There were several married couples who arrived with deep wounds and deep hope that something positive would come. They were not disappointed. There was such an outpouring of God's lavish love on these couples that I felt as if I were standing on holy ground. The fact is, I was.
My leadership team bonded together like a grand family of brothers and sister, joined by love and focus. Each of us was profoundly impacted by the privilege of walking alongside each other and those who attended. Individual journeys meshed and our own personal healings impacted each other.
This retreat was sponsored by the Catholic Diocese of Davenport, Hope and Healing Ministries. We incorporated some Catholic spiritual practices at different times during the retreat as optional. One beautiful experience for me was that I was asked to read a portion of Scripture during the Saturday evening Mass. Some of my team attended that Mass and we received a blessing from the presiding Priest. We were truly brothers and sisters in Christ and it was sacred for all of us.
As the retreat concluded, Reconciliation was offered, again as an option for those who wanted to participate. The Priest who offered Reconciliation said to one of our retreat participants, "Go in peace, you have suffered enough."
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Recovery
I went to the doctor yesterday and it seems that I was close to pneumonia. I am not on my second day of antibiotics and feeling much better than even yesterday. One more night of sleep and medication and I should feel human again. For now, I am spending time pulling together some loose ends from the Iowa retreat and will dive back in to saving the world in a few days.
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Retreat in Iowa
The retreat in Iowa was amazing, sacred, holy. I will write more. We battled sickness and fatigue the entire weekend, but these things always come at a high price. I am still sick, so I will be leaving for the doctor in a few minutes. All I can say is that I saw men and women set free, marriages restored, and life return. Peace
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Team Arrives in Iowa
Our team of two women and three men arrived in Iowa yesterday with no problems (always a good thing when you're flying!). We met with another team member at our hotel who drove in from Omaha and had dinner together. Today our final team member joins us and we will meet for breakfast and then on to our retreat facility for training and set up. Because this retreat is Catholic appropriate, we will meet with a priest from the Davenport diocese who will brief our team (composed of Catholics and non-Catholics) regarding Catholic practices. The participants arrive tomorrow at noon.
Allergy
Well, as I've said before, there seem to be weird circumstances that often accompany our retreats. Not looking for the boogey man here, but there's always something odd just before or during every retreat!! Anway, I've had health issues for a number of years that nobody can actually pin down, but from time to time my eyes almost swell closed and my face and neck break out in hives that are very disfiguring. I did some cleaning yesterday and I think my encounter with some serious dust when I emptied the vaccuum triggered an allergic reaction that began last night. I awoke this morning to a face that looks like I've been hit with a baseball bat. For this retreat, I guess my "inner beauty" will have to come through because my "outer beauty" looks like a meat grinder got to it! It hasn't stopped me and won't stop me, but man does this get old (and really humiliating!).
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Waiting
The weather has been beautiful this weekend and I have taken some time to be outside, to listen, to soak in the wonder of God's natural world. My team leaves for Iowa this week. The shipments have been made, training has taken place, materials have been assembled. Now, I wait. Wait and listen. Collecting myself and nourishing my soul. Waiting to go.
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Bizarre Circumstances
Our men's and women's retreat is next weekend in Iowa and my team is preparing for this new phase of our ministry. Today, our retreat materials will be shipped to the retreat facility, our training is almost complete and we are in the midst of spiritual and personal preparation. I am always surprised by, yet never surprised by, the bizarre circumstances that often surround any retreat. Personal turmoil. Illness. Accidents. Family crisis. Spiritual confusion. All of these are at play at one level or another with my leadership team, those who plan to attend, and with myself. I suppose I should write a book one day just about the events that surround the majority of retreats we've put on over the past fifteen years. No science fiction or horror writer could come up with the stuff we've experienced. Darkness and lies never let go without a fight.
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Mother's Day Peace
The origins of Mother's Day were not because of a greeting card company. The origins were because women wanted to pray for peace, to raise children in a world characterized by respect and tolerance, and to celebrate the nurturing role of motherhood as a means to accomplish world peace. Yesterday, I participated in a Mother's Day prayer vigil for peace. I reflected on the powerful impact that a nurturing care-giver can have on the shaping of a life. Today, I want you to be nice, share with others, and hold hands when crossing the street!
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Training Day
Friday was training day for my staff as we prepared for our first retreat for both men and women in Iowa. These are new training programs, so they helped me refine it and gave me important feedback which will help me to improve our effectiveness. Preparation and strategy is everything. Happy Mother's Day all.
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Passed Up
I am in the process of re-establishing my exercise routine. For reasons I won't go into here, my health has been up and down and really impaired exercise. I finally got my bicycle adjusted to facilitate riding for me and it is nice to be able to ride again. HOWEVER, I am REALLY out of shape! I feel like the little old lady I am (a temporary situation, but a real one for now!). Anyway, I rode last night for the second time this week. There was a threat of severe thunderstorms, so all the avid cyclists stayed in a small loop of town that is a large 1 1/4 mile circle. Usually they go out on the road, but lighting is nothing to take a chance on, so they rode where I ride. So here I am, going SLLLOOOOOOWWWWW and all these svelt, fit people are zipping past me, carrying on normal conversations as if they were having coffee. As I watched them pass me again and again and again, I became energized - not because they are svelt and fit, but because THEY PASSED ME!!!!!! One day! One day I'll at least be able to hold my own (I hope!). To move on, you move slow at first, but as strength grows, you move on!
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Thunder
It poured last night. Rain, thunder, lightning came in abundance. I was meeting a friend for coffee and conversation when my three year old grandson called me. "It's raining and the thunder is scaring me" he said. I reminded him that Mama was there to help him not be afraid and that it would go away soon. "Okay." was his response, and then he hung up. As always, it's important to be honest about your fear, use your voice (even when everyone else knows that there is rain and thunder!), and take the time to be reassured by that your storm will eventually go away. Okay?
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On the Road from Georgia
I am driving home after accompanying my husband to a Teen Challenge conference in Georgia. The conference went well and the facility was gorgeous. Most of all, it was great to be together for a change. We're in Tennessee right now and will be home later today. The upcoming week will be full of preparation for our Committed to Freedom retreat for men and women in Iowa. This will be a unique retreat because it is re-formatted to be Catholic appropriate since the Davenport Diocese is sponsoring us. We are excited about this new opportunity and expect God to do a continue work of healing for all who attend.
www.committedtofreedom.org
